Just... read it.

Chelsea: trisha, i have proof that i desperately need you back.

me: why! lemme hear it!

Chelsea: without you here to knock sense into me, i have turned into something i have avoided for a couple of years now.

me: a blonde?

Chelsea: that would probably be better. but this is who i am, i shouldn't be ashamed.

i am...

a Twifan.

a Twihard

a TwiCrack addict.

me: ummm

oh no

i know

...light.

Chelsea: oh no is right

me: i've been so ashamed

so embarrassed

so disappointed

Chelsea: my blogger dashboard shows me anonymously following the dealers to feed my addiction

i know way too much about the series.

i am currently reading the first book again for the 5th time...

after trying to read another book and taking 20 minutes to read the first sentence.

i.

am.

ruined.

and you know what is the worst part?

me: i don't know if i want to!

but tell me

Chelsea: the person i did depend on to pick me up out of my Twi-Hole...

fell into it, too.

me: andrew

i know, i know.

i shake my head in disbelief

Chelsea: i.

ruined.

my.

husband.

me: just sit back and think about what you've done

take a look in the mirror

at your cute little short hair

and your favorite green striped dress

and the fang scars on your neck!

you fool!

Chelsea: but in twilight they don't have fangs

and they sparkle in the sunlight

me: so they're fairies

Chelsea: BAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHHAHAAAAAA

oops

i literally just laughed out loud

at my desk

at work

me: alone in your office

Chelsea: it would be better if i was in an office! i'm at a reception desk!

me: more proof that you've destroyed yourself

Chelsea: my life is over.