Vespa, come. Vespa, sit. Vespa, stay.

One or two nights ago, Carlton decided it would be a good idea to take Vespa's collar off and let her chew on it for a few minutes. I don't know about you other dog lovers, but one of Vespa's most cherished and rare toys is a fresh-from-round-the-neck collar. There's something special about it. She can hardly sit still while you're taking it off her neck! It wasn't five minutes after she had the collar as a chew toy that she bit the plastic buckle in half. It was one of my favorite two collars of hers! And it was ruined. It was all pretty, with green and purple paisley and everything, and now it's all busted.

A little while after Carlton got home from work tonight, we took a trip to PetSmart. The last thing Carlton ever wants to do when he gets home from work is go right back out for errands, but he felt guilty about the collar situation so he agreed to go. Carlton decided that Vespa should have a "Thanksgiving" collar, so I picked out something festive for fall. She'll probably get another special Christmas collar for her birthday on December 2nd, too.

Now, let me preface this by saying that Vespa has been a bit "barkey" lately... meaning, she barks at anyone or any animal that walks down her street in her neighborhood past her window. She barks through the cinderblock fence at neighbors who are cleaning out their pools, grilling dinner, or any other typical neighborly back yard behavior. It has been frustrating me to the point of keeping the door closed, which I hate because she also loves to just lie down in the sunshine and chew on a raw hide. I'm afraid that we are turning into those neighbors with that dog in the back yard. When we were growing up on Remington Drive, my dad named our across-the-street neighbor "Dumb Donny" and his dog "Stupid Sam." Granted, Vespa doesn't hump other girl dogs, but she is starting to bark at everything!

So, back to the PetSmart story. We took Vespa with us just because... that's... what you do when you go to PetSmart. You take your dog with you. In we go. Of course, I was nervous taking her because of how barkey she's been. And I should have been. Walking in was pretty successful. Finding the collar aisle was successful. And picking out a collar was successful for the first minute or so. There was some sort of dog training class in the back of the store, and there was a lot of barking and dog traffic in the store. She started bubbling up.

"Buh."

"Buh."

"Raaah!"

Then she started this new thing she's been testing out at home from the window that looks out at the neighborhood. It's not a howl. It's not a bark. It's a freakin scream!!! She began echoing throughout the entire store, and it sounded like we were stomping on her tiny little puppy feet and kicking her and she was being run over by a truck all at the same time! It was so terrible! A lady walked by with a basket of dog chew toys and looked at us like we were crazy. I gave the hastily-selected orange collar to Carlton to check out at the front counter while I tried to get screaming Vespa out the door without walking past too many more dogs. And, of course, because there was a dog training class going on right then, there were about 4 dogs at the door practicing "sit" and "stay" with distractions all around. Distractions like Vespa, the screamer pup. I mean, the screams were piercing!!!

I got her outside and she started to calm down until she saw a dog in the distance taking a giant poo. And then another dog came out of the store, and she screamed some more. Scream, scream, scream!!! I was sooooo angry. Where did this behavior come from? It's terrible! Carlton came out of the store and we made our way to the car as quickly as we could. Still screaming once we're in the car. Dog still taking a giant poo. Other dogs getting into and out of their cars. It was a nightmare!!!

This was it. I'd had it. As soon as we got home I started looking up ways to train your dog. Tonight, Carlton and I decided to begin with the basics. "Vespa, come." "Vespa, sit." At first, she totally got angry at us. Since I always talk for Vespa at home, I'll translate for you exactly what she was saying to us: "You want me to do something for that cheese stick? I don't have to please you to get food. Are you kidding me???" With a few other choice words here and there, that's pretty much a summary of what she was saying. And as she said that through frustrated bubbling and little growls, she hopped, ran, and bounced around the room. I would hold out the cheese and she would come in for it until I gave her a command. That's when the tantrums started.

Eventually, with Carlton (the dominant male of the pack) by my side, we were able to calm her down and beat her into submission. No, just kidding, we got her calmed down by talking very quietly and gently. And with a peace offering of cheese. Once the "come" command was sticking, we re-taught the "sit" command. Yeah, we are starting all over. She hasn't been "sitting" for us like she should in order to remember the action associated with the command, so we started from scratch. Tomorrow we'll practice with her throughout the day (I'm off work, w00t! and Carlton is working from home, double w00t!!!) so we can get a full day of practice in. Then we'll start reteaching "stay" which she has learned from her total freak-outs when someone rings the doorbell. Barking, according to Caesar the Dog Whisperer, can be stopped/controlled once the pup is comfortable with taking other commands from us. Come, sit, stay, no bark, and we'll branch out from there. I'd like her to be able to "shake" everyone's hand when we come home for Christmas!!!

FYI: During Saunders and Katie's visit to Arizona, Katie made a valliant attempt at taking some pictures of Vespa for her blog. The crazy Vespa pictures in this post are thanks to her efforts!